Awesome. I can so very much appreciate the journey you're on, as well as others have discussed in the show The Journey Home. I am also on my own journey, though I highly doubt it will end where yours has, in the Catholic Church. But I can truly relate to your analogy of tributaries to the main river.
But I've always been a different sort. If I were to use your analogy - it would probably be that I'm busily paddling UPRIVER, trying to get to the Source - and that the broader river keeps going into smaller and smaller tributaries. I would have used the Broad Path vs the rocky narrow path - but the implication is that everyone else is wrong and doomed to hell - and I don't believe that.
At any rate - as usual in my life - I seem to need to do it the hard way. You'd think that at nearly 70, I might have figured out that it IS indeed the hard way - but I don't know any other way.
My own conversion can be traced to when I was 15, but I can also recall other spiritual experiences before that: I was searching, just not sure for What. Or as it turned out, Who. And then for many decades after, in my search for the Truth, or understanding the Truth, I became quite doctrinal. If only I could so fully understand Scripture that I could then know just what God was saying in His Word. But instead, reading with a totally open mind - I found many views - some opposing, were accepted by God. If you'd like a verse direct from Jesus on this, it's this one:
Matthew 11:18-19 - ..."For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’ But wisdom is proved right by her deeds.” Now obviously Jesus was not either of those accusations, nor was John, but it's clear that John and Jesus had very different methods for reaching people. It is also as Paul said when he wrote, "I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some." Actually that whole part of the chapter is instructive.
There have probably been times where, in a moment of spiritual desperation, you made a statement or asked a question of the Lord - and He responded. Perhaps not in that moment, or perhaps so. He has done this to me on a number of occasions. So I knew when I asked this of the Lord - He would answer - and it might not be the answer I wanted or was looking for. But I had had quite enough of competing answers. I asked Him: "I just want to know the Truth."
If that ultimately leads me to a specific denomination, including the Catholic church - OK. If it leads me into a type of Christian Mysticism (quite like many Catholic mystics) - again, OK. But what I'm after is the relationship, not the doctrine. I've had the doctrine.
I'm sorry this is so long: it's a personal failing. But as you have before, you really struck something here. You've had the courage to say hard things in the past and I admire that. I know it came with costs. I salute you for the courage to move forward, against the crowd and walk your own narrow path.
TLDNR: I see you walking your own narrow path. Mine does not appear to be the same narrow path - but I recognize you walking yours.
Thank you so much brother Mark for letting us tag along on your amazing pilgrimage. I think if I've discovered anything over the last few years it been the amazing realization of how wonderful this crazy, screwed up, mess of humanity this thing we call the church is. I've come to appreciate how everyone I encounter has something to offer in deepening my understanding of God. I've stopped looking for divisions and differences that divide. I'm learning to be much better at celebrating them.
Mark, I found your conversion story here immensely interesting although it was a cliff hanger in that I am not sure how you ended up landing in the Roman Catholic Church from evangelicalism! Thanks for sharing. I know many who struggled with the same problem of feeling uncertain about their faith in Jesus. When it comes to salvation, I rest in the words of the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 2:8-10. Thanks for sharing.
Great read! I like to think that the simplified explanation of the difference between Catholics and Protestants is that conversion and salvation are often life-long processes for Catholics but may only be moments for Protestants.
Great stuff - looking forward to reading the rest. The Christian walk is unique to each of us, but universally messy. I think most Christians are afraid of the mess, the conflicts, the doubts and fears, and the impact of sin on our lives. A couple of years ago I was struck by John Donne's Holy Sonnets which express all this so very well, including his journey between Catholicism and Anglicanism (see my book Conflicted Faith). I appreciate your honest yet faith-filled writing - definitely an encouragement.
I prefer a distinction between "fundamentalist" and "evangelical" that would be lost on Roman Catholics. But I think it would be helpful. Of course, some of Mark's experience of weekly guilt describes more of a "fundamentalist" experience vs a grace oriented evangelical experience.
Awesome. I can so very much appreciate the journey you're on, as well as others have discussed in the show The Journey Home. I am also on my own journey, though I highly doubt it will end where yours has, in the Catholic Church. But I can truly relate to your analogy of tributaries to the main river.
But I've always been a different sort. If I were to use your analogy - it would probably be that I'm busily paddling UPRIVER, trying to get to the Source - and that the broader river keeps going into smaller and smaller tributaries. I would have used the Broad Path vs the rocky narrow path - but the implication is that everyone else is wrong and doomed to hell - and I don't believe that.
At any rate - as usual in my life - I seem to need to do it the hard way. You'd think that at nearly 70, I might have figured out that it IS indeed the hard way - but I don't know any other way.
My own conversion can be traced to when I was 15, but I can also recall other spiritual experiences before that: I was searching, just not sure for What. Or as it turned out, Who. And then for many decades after, in my search for the Truth, or understanding the Truth, I became quite doctrinal. If only I could so fully understand Scripture that I could then know just what God was saying in His Word. But instead, reading with a totally open mind - I found many views - some opposing, were accepted by God. If you'd like a verse direct from Jesus on this, it's this one:
Matthew 11:18-19 - ..."For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’ But wisdom is proved right by her deeds.” Now obviously Jesus was not either of those accusations, nor was John, but it's clear that John and Jesus had very different methods for reaching people. It is also as Paul said when he wrote, "I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some." Actually that whole part of the chapter is instructive.
There have probably been times where, in a moment of spiritual desperation, you made a statement or asked a question of the Lord - and He responded. Perhaps not in that moment, or perhaps so. He has done this to me on a number of occasions. So I knew when I asked this of the Lord - He would answer - and it might not be the answer I wanted or was looking for. But I had had quite enough of competing answers. I asked Him: "I just want to know the Truth."
If that ultimately leads me to a specific denomination, including the Catholic church - OK. If it leads me into a type of Christian Mysticism (quite like many Catholic mystics) - again, OK. But what I'm after is the relationship, not the doctrine. I've had the doctrine.
I'm sorry this is so long: it's a personal failing. But as you have before, you really struck something here. You've had the courage to say hard things in the past and I admire that. I know it came with costs. I salute you for the courage to move forward, against the crowd and walk your own narrow path.
TLDNR: I see you walking your own narrow path. Mine does not appear to be the same narrow path - but I recognize you walking yours.
Thank you so much brother Mark for letting us tag along on your amazing pilgrimage. I think if I've discovered anything over the last few years it been the amazing realization of how wonderful this crazy, screwed up, mess of humanity this thing we call the church is. I've come to appreciate how everyone I encounter has something to offer in deepening my understanding of God. I've stopped looking for divisions and differences that divide. I'm learning to be much better at celebrating them.
enjoyable stuff. the angels are laughing.
Mark, I found your conversion story here immensely interesting although it was a cliff hanger in that I am not sure how you ended up landing in the Roman Catholic Church from evangelicalism! Thanks for sharing. I know many who struggled with the same problem of feeling uncertain about their faith in Jesus. When it comes to salvation, I rest in the words of the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 2:8-10. Thanks for sharing.
Loved this piece! Looking forward to reading your book.
Great read! I like to think that the simplified explanation of the difference between Catholics and Protestants is that conversion and salvation are often life-long processes for Catholics but may only be moments for Protestants.
Thanks for sharing this. I learned some new things about you. Quite inspiring.
Great stuff - looking forward to reading the rest. The Christian walk is unique to each of us, but universally messy. I think most Christians are afraid of the mess, the conflicts, the doubts and fears, and the impact of sin on our lives. A couple of years ago I was struck by John Donne's Holy Sonnets which express all this so very well, including his journey between Catholicism and Anglicanism (see my book Conflicted Faith). I appreciate your honest yet faith-filled writing - definitely an encouragement.
I prefer a distinction between "fundamentalist" and "evangelical" that would be lost on Roman Catholics. But I think it would be helpful. Of course, some of Mark's experience of weekly guilt describes more of a "fundamentalist" experience vs a grace oriented evangelical experience.